I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do

I have been married for 10-years of my the 13-year relationship. My 38-year old wife (who has 3-kids from a previous relationship that I supported and raised) filed for divorce last December and now we are in reconciliation mode. I don't have anything concrete to go on, just somewhat suggestive converation I saw on her MySpace inbox with two guys from the local gym where she works out. She's always been somewhat a flirt. I have never had any reason to doubt her in 13-years. Now I can't get it out of my mind. I also saw several long conversations (20-30 minutes) with strange phone numbers on her cell phone bill during this time. We were apart day and night for 2-months, but still living in the same house. Now we are back together like nothing happened. My mind is running wild and I can't control it. I have ask her several times if she did something while we were apart and she has told me no. Maybe I am looking for a reason to leave. I don't know.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

You were going to get a divorce...so if she was seeing someone else.......that should not be a shock to you. It is not like she did it when you were not getting a divorce. Let it go. You are not going to be able to make the marriage work if you are so wrapped up in what she did when you were going to divorce. Maybe that is why she wants a divorce from you because you are insecure.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Ask her if she did...

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Do you want to leave? Usually, when you have these nagging feelings that something is not right---it isn't...I would go with my gut. Something probably did go on, especially since you are feeling such intense emotions over it---Snop about, call the cell #'s~~Just step back and take inventory.

Good Luck.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

think about why you separated in the first place. usually it was for a very good reason. are you likely to separate again? is it a good relationship?

If you never doubted her before, and she said nothing happened, then you need to try to get over (or figure out) why you are still suspicious. maybe you ARE looking for a reason to leave. I'm not asking why you left, just saying that you should think about what brought on the separation in the first place and build your decision from there. If she doesnt misbehave anymore, then little by little the nagging feeling will go away. good luck.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

You are going to have to forgive and forget. The way you do that is when you start wondering, go look yourself in the eye in the mirror and tell yourself to stop it. Works, I promise.

If you do not do this then yes, you are looking to leave.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

There's really not much you can do other than watch, listen and learn. You can talk to her about it, ask her questions, but whether you get truthful or not answers is another thing. You need to get past this if you want your relationship to work out. Try and talk about.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Maybe you are looking for a reason not to reconcile, if not why were you checking her cell phone? I think you should just ask her, if you don't you will never know and it will bother you more and more. You should be able to tell something when you see her reaction to your asking, and that may be all you need to confirm your suspitions. Good luck.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Don't make yourself crazy....if she did do something while you were seperated then let it go....you are back together now and concentrate on making this relationship stronger and ask her to be honest with you from now on and any suspicisions you have now should be addressed but let the past alone.......you were seperated on the way to a divorce.....let it go..

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

the messeges from two guys at the gym would definitely have me concerned too. I swear, gyms are getting to be like clubs anymore. People are hooking up left and right. I dont trust alot of guys at the gym. They start pumping up a bit and think they are gods gift to women, telling them everything they want to hear to get them in bed.

I dont really know what to tell you. I guess if you love her and want to be with her, just let it go. Does she ever ask you if you hooked up with anyone during your split? If she is not worried about your business, then i guess you shouldnt worry about hers.

I think also that you could be driving yourself crazy for no reason. I mean, there is a good chance she didnt do anything, and all of this madness you are going through could create another big problem.

I'd say just leave it alone

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

you need to open your lines of communication and tell your wife that you understand you were not together and you cant' get mad if she did see someone else. maybe you don't want to know cuz it might just hurt worse to hear. You decide, but in the end do you really need to know

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Suspicion and jealousy can ruin a relationship faster than anything else. If you can't get a straight answer from her regarding the evidence you found. Then you may have a reason for feeling this way.

You have a couple of choices here: Count your loss and run. Try to get over it. Both of you go to counseling. Figure that her thought process was that you were "separated" and probably going to get a divorce, so she was just checking out the merchandise available to her and possibly taking it out for a test drive.

What you have to decide is what you really want. Sit down with her tell her of your suspicions, thoughts, feelings and see what she has to say. Try not to accuse her of anything. Try not to get upset or defensive. Tell her that you want your marriage to work now and your willing to make it work, but with these feelings you are having a hard time not knowing for sure. See if she then clams up - adding fuel to the thought that she did indeed screw around- or tells you everything and tries to make amends (if necessary).

Good luck

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

why investigate? if you are back together,just concentrate on your relationship,it was the past and you were separated.why find a new conflict when you are trying to repair the past?good luck'

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

There was something that caused you to separate. She thought it was over and so did you. A lot of people find other persons during this time. If you can be okay with this, then try to work it out... if not, your mind will continue to run wild until you work it out with her. It will be hard to move past, but if you are willing then do so, but don't drag it on if you can't. If you can't forgive her or get over it, don't keep throwing it in her face.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

You need to bag it. You either love her or leave her. My ex-wife did that to me and I knew in my heart I would never forgive her. During reconciliation I started seeing other woman just to put an end to things. I know, it's selfish but I would rather be a fool in love than a tool.

Cheers

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

as you say you guys were separated,

you might be right you are looking for a reason to leave so you guys should seek counseling before deciding if you guys should get a divorce

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

If you were separated, you were separated... You have to let it go. If she told you no, it means no. You have to get past it eventually. What difference does that make, anyway? She's with you now. Be honest with yourself and ask if you even want to be in this relationship; if the answer is yes, then you have to find the strength to drop the issue and be concerned with the future, not the past. You have got to learn to control your "wild mind".

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

you raised her kids she does not need you any more. smoke a cig. and move on dude.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Those were like 2 months of freedom for her. She may not have done anything wrong but now is she still conversating with them and having these talks on her phone? I think My Space destroys so many relationships. Could you forgive her if she did do something? The thoughts running through your head will kill you! You either need to talk to her or find a way to set your mind at ease. If nothing else give her all the room in the world to do whatever she wants and she is after all a female. Give her the rope and she will hang herself as we all do and then you will know.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

Since you are in reconciling mode....you need to reconcile. Really sit down together for a good open talk about 'everything'. Tell her you really need to know, and that you do not want to be suspicious or jealous, but that you have to build trust up for eachother through this time of healing.

Your mind is going to run wild, esp. because you said you got back together like nothing happened. That means there are things left unfinished that must be resolved. The 'myspace' thing....is that recent? Her having a myspace is going to make you feel left out of certain areas to begin with. So, she really needs to be open and honest with you and you with her. Then you have to consider if this is the type of relationship you want to be involved with.

No one wants to be in a doubting relationship.

My best to you and your family.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

If you want your marriage to work then you are going to have to accept her version of the truth. You will never know for sure you have shown her by asking her that you have suspicions. She has told you no don't become the detective because you may not like what you find out and this will destroy the trust. Remember that you had separated at the time, good luck I know it's painful.

I Think My Wife Had Sex With Another Guy During Our 2-month Separation, But I Am Not Sure... What Do I Do?

As you were apart during that period and it is none of your business what happened - you need to let it go or end the relationship because there really cannot be a reconciliation if you both aren't willing to put the bad things in the past aside and commit to each other to make it work now.